Pages

Thursday, January 12, 2012

This Week On Teen Mom 2: Highlights/Lowlights Pt1


Remember in the Old Testament when God would get mad at humanity and send down a plague of locusts? Well this week MTV showed two new episodes of Teen Mom 2 back to back. What we're being punished for now I'm not sure. To make the suffering a little bit easier we have for you Carrie's rundown of the highs and lows of both episodes starting with the first today and the second episode tomorrow. Enjoy and please practice safe sex. This show does not need any more sequels.
-Clinto

TEEN MOM 2: MOMMY RUNDOWN FUNDOWN

Leah
Leah and Adam are still worried about Goggle baby's condition. They take her to get tested, she may have a genetic issue, everybody frets.

The Good:
 GOGGLE BABY'S UGGS OH MY GOD.

The Bad:
-Bringing home a feral cat to tiny, possibly ill babies
-Cory is again wearing his lime green "Cory" shirt
-"Splints arent as cute as glasses" Tough but fair, Leah

The Ugly:
 Cory has to sound out goggle baby's potential genetic issue.


Chelsea:
Chelsea decides to whore herself up for funsies. Chelsea and Adam continue to be the worst.

The embarrassing:
-Xtina makeover
-Taking styling advice from Megan
-ANOTHER HAIR FAKEOUT TO ME - she dyed it, THEN it was brown, THEN it was stripper blonde again
-Chelsea applying eyeliner

The typical:
Chelsea putting lipgloss on Aubree, aka clearly grooming her for Toddles and Tiaras.

The tragic:
-Adam's gentlemanly spirit:  Chelsea: "Megan's pregnant" Adam:"(Snort) Figures, who's the lucky guy?"
-MEGAN BEING PREGNANT


Facelyn:
Facelyn throws Isaac a bday party that he won't remember and doesn't understand because he's fucking one.

The boring:
All of it.

The adorable:
-Isaac's party hat
-Poster of the baby hamburglar at the party store
-Tiny baby air jordans

The terrifying:
Holy shit Jo's mom.

Jenelle:
Jenelle continues to make terrible life choices, that may or may not start at Planet Fun. Apparently she isn't going to jail, yet.

The Awesome:
-Rekindling your love with your ex-con bf at Planet Fun
-Jenelle's mom dispensing this sage advice re: her courtdate: "Don't talk"
-Apparently, Jenelle and Kieffer's court date being cancelled? I had no idea a cancelled court date = Christmas

The Horrifying:
"It's not like you beat me, you just shoved me out of the way"
Didn't Juliet say that to Romeo at one point?

The Jenelle, In a Nutshell:
"How long do I have to stay clean for?"

5 comments:

  1. Thank you for addressing Chelsea's hair crisis. I swear, every scene her hair was a different color. I get that they edit things around, but jesus christ CONTINUITY.

    ReplyDelete
  2. you guys are fuckina ass wholes these girls go through shit you cant even dream off.. ge fucking lifes. you make me sick.. youshould be hit by a car.. oh and btw i love chelsies hair...

    ReplyDelete
  3. ^ oh and how fuckin dare you make fun of those poor babies are you sick bc you need help!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. what is a "fuckina ass whole?"

    ReplyDelete
  5. These posts are just for fun dude, I find them fucking hilarious
    None of it's that offensive and by the way, Mtv edits the shit out of this show and all those girls are basically mini celebs now and they all get their Mtv pay check so their life isn't that horrible.
    Oh and news flash: these bitches aren't the only teen moms in the world (SHOCKING I KNOW) and there's hundreds of thousands of teen moms not on a hit tv show getting payed for their life drama. A lot of teen moms can't even afford to feed their babies.
    How someone has sympathy for that piece of shit named Jenelle or Chelsea especially is beyonnnnd me.
    /end rant

    PS: ALL HAIL GOGGLE BABY!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete